THERE’S a belief that it takes a village to raise a child.
One borough charity is looking for men to step up as mentors to help make that village a reality, in Reading.
“It’s something we’ve lost over time,” says mentor manager for Chapter2, Rob, “but the need for that village is just as prevalent as it ever was.
“When a boy grows up without a father, he will look for belonging elsewhere; and increasingly, young people are turning to the virtual world, sometimes seeing it as more real than off-line life.
“Influencers are stepping into that gap, often presenting a very narrow version of masculinity, and without an alternative, this can become what boys aspire to.”
Reading charity Chapter2, is trying to step into that space and to offer something different – a healthier version of belonging.
“We’re inviting the 60,000 men in Reading over the age of 20 to consider whether they want to be part of that “village” and to play a role in supporting a young person,” Said Rob.
Chapter2 is a member of the Wokingham Communities Vision.
Its work, mentoring boys, is building and maintaining communities and supporting young people to live happier, healthier and more independent lives.
Its mentor training days have built up a network of mentors and allies keen to support Chapter2’s work; men who recognise that fatherlessness is an issue and want to do something about it.
The charity also bring families together, particularly single mothers, through regular events like Mother’s Day lunches, where they can bring younger children along.
“Last July, we took a group of boys and their mentors to the beach,” said Rob.
“For some of the boys, it was their first time – they didn’t even know what a day at the beach looked like.
“There were five men there who didn’t know each other beforehand, but they had all come with the same intention: to spend time with their mentees and do something a father might have done with their son.
“Over the course of the day, the boys began to play together, even though they didn’t know each other at the start.
“They shared a meal, had hot chocolates, and spent time just being together.
“What stood out was that the boys were seeing, in their mentors, healthy masculinity – men showing care, giving their time, and being emotionally present.
“It offered them an example of what masculinity can look like when it is grounded in kindness rather than dominance.”
Many of the boys referred to Chapter2 have experienced trauma, including fatherlessness, which can leave them in a constant state of fight or flight.
“Without addressing that, you’re often only dealing with the symptoms rather than the cause,” said Rob.
“Mentoring provides a consistent, positive adult presence, which can begin to change that.
“For one boy, his wellbeing had been in decline before he was introduced to a mentor.
“From that point, there was a clear shift – mentoring helped stop that decline, his mentor was able to help him with his footballing and the boy became captain of his football club.”
All Chapter2 mentors and allies are subject to an enhanced DBS check and assessment process.
Wokingham Communities Vision is a collaborative initiative designed to create a thriving, inclusive, and sustainable community by the year 2035.
For information, and to enquire about mentoring with Chapter2, visit: chapter2.org.uk, and communitiesvision.co.uk.
