Once a year at the end of August,
Mums buy the new shoes for school,
Jed’s feet are practically square so
They had to be measured … as a rule.
2009: the year Jed turned 11,
The shoe shop was totally packed
With mums and kids in the four to
Seven age-bracket … hard to be exact,
The assistant measured Jed’s feet and
Loudly announced to my silent swearing,
“Your son is measuring a very wide six,
But that’s only size four that he’s wearing.”
Never in my life … have I encountered
such a collective-disapproval-stare,
It brought out my very worst side and
So … feigning an irresponsible air …
I came back with the following reply,
“It’s ok … I tucked his toes under …
You know .. ancient Japanese-style.”
A sudden hush louder than thunder
And a roomful of righteous mothers,
All fiercely glaring in my direction …
Wondering … whether or not to get
On their phones to child protection.
Just in case there are those amongst
You … who are feeling slightly shocked,
Don’t worry … Jed is 25 now and
He’d spent that whole summer in Crocs.
Pam Ski
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